Shakey's

I've realized that my last few blog entries have been fairly long, and in one case, elaborate. Not all my stories will involve bible-thumping homosexuals or the consumption of hog-head. I don't want to peak too soon. My goal is to go at least 3 months before I jump-the-shark (See:www.jumptheshark.com), so let's slow it down a little bit. I do have a short story to tell, but first I'd like to provide a short list of the things I like and dislike about living in Palawan. The culture is different, the people are different, and the food is different. You know you aren't in Canada anymore when retail clerks not only spontaneously break out into a choreographed line dance, but actually seem to enjoy it. All 10 minutes of it. Andrew has captured this on camera and I will post it soon for you to judge.

Now, in no particular order: What I Likes!

1. I enjoy the fact that 90% of the people in this city (and most likely province) are ultra polite, friendly, and generally awesome. You walk up to the entrance to a fast-food joint, a guard opens the door and says "Hello sir" or "Welcome to *establishment* sir" while flashing a winning smile. You go to the counter to order some food and the employee welcomes you with a toothy grin. Oh shit....Pineapple Juice has ice... An employee notices this minor mistake, on his own no less, and runs away to fix the problem. I'm shocked that they don't thank you for taking a piss. Actually, now that I think about it, shocked isn't the right word. Disappointed.

2. NCCC.

3. The kids. I'm a local celebrity. Wherever I go the kids react in an assortment of equally awesome ways. I get a lot of smiles and "What's your name?", but the best is when the kids shout "Hey dude!!", "Wassup Man", and once "Evening Bro!". I was on an epic bike ride the other day and a short fat kid shouted "Wassup n***ah!". He was probably making fun of me, but I don't care.

Things I Don't Likes!

1. Getting ripped off. I realize I have tourist imprinted on my forehead, and I expect to pay a little more for things than the locals. I was warned of this and I fully accept it. However, I'm not paying three times as much as the next guy. I have to laugh when the tricycle driver says "20 pesos...". "Regular fare is 7 pesos you shitface", has been on the very tip of my tongue more than once. It may sound petty, getting worked up over paying what amounts to 50 cents rather than 15 cents, but it's the Goddamn principle. I do admire the balls it must take to ask a customer for over triple standard fare though, especially when there are approximately 20 zillion other tricycles on the road willing to charge normal fare. Maybe I'll carry around "An Introduction to Economics" and provide free lessons on supply and demand next time.

2. The heat. It's hot heat. Hot Hot Heat.

Anyway, we decide to go to Shakey's Pizza the other night. Apparently Shakey's is a big deal in the U.S. with thousands of stores nationwide. Heh. Who knew? It is one of the few "western style" fast food joints in the city. The only others are Chow King, Jollibee, and Dunkin Donuts. We had exhausted Jollibee and Chow King for the moment, and as far as I know Dunkin Donuts only sells donuts and shitty coffee. Andrew ordered pizza, I ordered spaghetti, and we decided to try 6 Shakey's Wings. Well the wings were delicious, but they held a dark secret. Eating your way to the center revealed that HA! Not cooked asshole!

Think rare steak, but more chickeny.

I'm no foodologist, and I'm pretty lenient when it comes to sanitary practices. I've even been known to eat off the floor on occasion. BUT, I'm pretty sure (correct me if I'm wrong Sweetapple) you're supposed to thoroughly cook chicken. Just sayin.

Andy summed it up best:

"Here at Shakey's, we will give you the uncontrollable shakes. Thats our guarantee"

Also, Happy belated Birthday Pat!